


On The Ride Over

by VampAmber



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Canonical Character Death, Castiel Gets His Wings Back (Supernatural), Castiel Loves Dean Winchester, Castiel and Dean Winchester Need to Use Their Words, Character Death Fix, Coda, Complete, Dean Winchester Loves Castiel, Dean/Cas Tropefest 5k Mid-Winter Challenge (Supernatural), Driving, Episode Fix-It: s15e20 Carry On, Episode: s15e18 Despair - Castiel's Confession Scene, Fix-It, Heaven, Introspection, Introspective Dean Winchester, Jack Kline Fixes Things, Jack Kline as God, Light Angst, M/M, One Shot, Post-Finale, Sam Winchester Ships Castiel/Dean Winchester, Season/Series 15, Winged Castiel (Supernatural), how it should've went
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-12
Updated: 2021-01-12
Packaged: 2021-03-16 06:15:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28702029
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VampAmber/pseuds/VampAmber
Summary: Season 15 episode 20/series finale fix it (because damn, did it need it)Long drives through empty back roads had always calmed Dean down and helped him think, back on Earth when he was still alive. So when he finished talking with Bobby, hopping behind the wheel of Heaven's version of Baby was the natural next step. There was a hell of a lot of stuff that had happened in such a short amount of time, and now he finally had a chance to process it all. The next step would be to find Cas of course, to tell him the feelings were mutual, but for now (and until he knew how to find the angel), he'd drive and think. Until he heard that flutter of wings he hadn't heard in years, that he'd always missed...
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 6
Kudos: 125
Collections: Dean/Cas Tropefest 2021 Mid-Winter 5k, SPN Finale "Destiel is CANON" Collection





	On The Ride Over

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Tropefest! I will, hopefully, be able to write one or two more to post this week, but if all else fails, at least I got this one. ^_^
> 
> And now I can't think of anything else to say. Does that mean I'm a pod person now? Eh, as long as I can write.

It wasn’t instant. Of course it wasn’t instant. That whole love at first sight thing only existed in Disney movies and romance novels. There was something there even in the beginning, though, something that Dean, at the time, had no way of describing. That pull, that little tug. It was probably that profound bond that Cas had always brought up, back in the beginning. Back when everything was so much easier.

Dean couldn’t help the sarcastic yet sentimental smile that spread across his face at that thought. For most people, getting yanked out of literal Hell by an angel and having to do all kinds of supernatural side missions to stop the gates from opening, letting Lucifer out to play and starting the actual freaking apocalypse, would probably be as far away from ‘easy’ as you could get. But that was the damn tutorial mode when you remembered the leviathans, the Mark of Cain, God’s wacky sister, then having to defeat God Himself from screwing over all of humanity. Yeah, super easy mode with all the cheat codes activated.

Charlie would’ve definitely approved of that messload of video game metaphors, which caused Dean to make a quick mental note to swing by her patch of Heaven soon. It had been way too long since he’d hugged the original version of the unofficial Winchester little sister, so that should definitely be near the top of the list.

But yeah, those first few years were a bit overwhelming to really notice much of anything going on that didn’t involve just surviving until the next thing came around to kick their asses, then kicking said asses, and so on, and so forth. Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

Purgatory, though. An entire freaking year to think, and rethink, and overthink, and sending out so many prayers that were never answered, but saying them all anyway. Because they needed to be said. Obviously, Dean wasn’t gushing on about how much he hearted Cas or whatever, but he did let loose a few minor revelations in some of the later ones. Like how much he needed Cas. Not the way he needed other people, or Benny (though he wouldn’t have made it without the vampire’s assistance and eventual friendship), or even needed his brother. Dean was perfectly fine now with admitting that they had some seriously therapy-needing codependency issues after Sam was back in the Impala’s seat again full time, but the Cas need? It was even bigger than that. Bigger, and very, very different.

All that time to think, time to self analyze, helped Dean sort through a few of his bigger emotional roadblocks. He’d never noticed his own internalized homophobia until then, for example. John had never specifically spoken out as homophobic, but following in his footsteps like Daddy’s good little soldier meant that heterosexual was the default, and only, setting. He’d looked at guys, noticed them, but he’d never quite caught on that his libido was trying to tell him that he was bisexual. Not that it mattered as much when it came to Cas, since he was only an angel inhabiting Jimmy Novak and not technically male or female or anything that actually had a spot in the normal gender spectrum. The one time he’d met the actual Jimmy, there really hadn’t been anything going for him. He’d looked okay, but he could’ve been any random Joe off the street and Dean would’ve felt just as much attraction (meaning probably none). The body wasn’t what he’d been drawn to, but what was inside. That was probably the reason that Lucifer taking it for a ride felt so blasphemous. It was tainting the one piece of physical solidarity that Cas had. Dean had figured out by that time that what he’d been feeling towards Cas was some kind of romantic love, which only made the whole ordeal that much worse. Seeing your worst enemy looking at you from the guy you loved’s eyes, the pain was indescribable. The bastard had done the same thing with Sam, which only added to the happy fantasies Dean would sometimes have of the Empty taking out its anger on his archangel ass. But with Cas, with Cas it had always felt so much worse.

Dean leaned his arm out the driver’s side window as he and Baby soared through the perfect roads of Heaven. He’d always done his best thinking this way, going for nice, long rides. Something about the scenery passing by, at what was usually at least ten or fifteen miles per hour faster than what was legal, it felt like he was flying, only without any of that airplane bullshit. He’d never understood how Sam wasn’t even slightly afraid on planes. Those things could stall and fall out of the air with just one tiny piece among millions of tiny pieces going slightly askew. He may have been dead now, and there most likely weren’t any planes crashing in Heaven, unless Jack had his dad’s sense of humor, but Dean still never wanted to be in one of those things ever again.

Dean’s strong hand gripped the wheel, moving as an extension of the car, or as if the car was an extension of him. By now, it was probably both. Everything about driving was second nature, even learning to correct himself whenever Cas had flapped in, startling him less and less as the years went by. He had actually missed the sound when Cas had fallen. Dean winced at the sting of guilt, regretting what he’d done, pushing away the dorky, clueless angel who’d been pretty much human, basically kicking him out. He understood why he’d done it, going off of what he’d known at the time, but it still sat heavy in his gut, randomly coming up for revenge every so often. It was only a faint echo of what it used to be when he and his gut were still alive, but it was still there, as it would probably always be.

The sudden, actual sound of flapping wings startled Dean so much that he jerked the wheel without thinking, veering off course enough that he’d probably be wrecked on the side of the road if he were still on Earth. He heard a thump as Cas hit the door from the unexpected swerve. It only took Dean’s brain a few seconds to automatically right the car’s course, and only a few seconds more for him to all but slam on the brakes, pulling over into the breakdown area out of habit and habit alone. “The fuck?!” Dean had shouted eloquently during those seconds.

The sound of a trench coat shifting hit Dean in the heart, right before his favorite words left the angel’s lips. “Hello, Dean,” Cas said, sounding the exact same as he had pretty much every other time he’d used that same phrase.

Dean jerked around in his seat, for once thankful that the Impala hadn’t had seat belts in life, and that it was safe enough in Heaven to not need them now. “Cas!” Dean yelped, his head spinning a little from the unintentional stunt show he’d just put Baby through. “How… I mean… Bobby said you were…”

Castiel chuckled at his hunter’s sputtering response. It had felt like he’d been waiting eons just to hear that voice again. And even if that was all he’d ever have, every second had been worth it. “Jack had told me that you,” the angel paused for a moment, still having some difficulty thinking of the next word whenever Dean was concerned. “That you had died, and were here now.” His face scrunched up in joy then, eyes a little misty around the edges.

“Bobby said that Jack had saved you from the Empty,” Dean pointed out, still a bit too shook up to brain properly just yet.

“He did, before anything else,” Castiel explained. “I was going to return, but then I found out you weren’t there anymore.”

“Yeah, I survived against Chuck, and bit it on a milk run vamp hunt,” Dean said, blushing ever so slightly in embarrassment. “Stupid, right?”

“It definitely wasn’t a ‘ milk run’, Dean,” Castiel explained, using the air quotes that Dean had definitely missed when the angel had stopped doing them as often. “That woman, she’d had a witch’s help, because she knew that you were both coming. The rebar, it… either you or Sam, the hex bag was made to end one of your lives.”

“Shit, seriously?”

“Of course, Dean. I would never lie to you.” Castiel smiled then, one so big that Dean had only ever seen him wear it once. “Jack was about to fix it, to heal you, but your words had moved Him to stay his hand. He wanted peace for you, a kind of peace He could only give you here. He… He knew that you would never stop giving of yourself for as long as you lived, giving so much more than you could possibly spare. So,” he ended with a vague motion to indicate their current surroundings.

“But,” Dean started to argue, but the reasons deflated before they’d even really solidified. “Yeah, I guess that does sound like me.”

“Just like I told you,” Castiel said, almost wistfully.

“Yeah, umm, about that, Cas?” Dean said, sounding more awkward than the angel could ever recall.

Without realizing it, Castiel mimicked Dean’s awkwardness. “Yes?” There had always been the chance that his feelings were unrequited. It had been the most likely outcome by a large margin, as far as Castiel knew. It had been the biggest reason behind his not letting the hunter respond before he was taken by the Empty. But just having Dean here, having him whole and safe and happy, that was more than enough, more than he would have ever thought possible after making that quasi-Faustian bargain with the Empty.

“Well, I…” Dean started, trying to twist himself around to better see Cas as he spoke. After finally admitting that it was never going to happen with him in the backseat, he let out a small sound of annoyance. “Get in the front, I can’t turn around right.”

There was that beautiful flapping sound as Castiel disappeared from the back seat and materialized in the front. “Of course, Dean,” he said, shifting slightly to properly face Dean.

“That’s,” Dean muttered. “Yeah, that works.” Apparently you could get just as nervous about saying something as you could everywhere else. “The thing is, Cas.”

Castiel interrupted him. “It’s okay, Dean. I can understand if you don’t return my… my confession, my feelings for you.”

“Cas,” Dean said, trying to interrupt the angel so that he could finish what he’d been about to say.

“I meant what I said about the happiness not being in the having, but in just being,” Castiel went on, oblivious now to Dean trying to take the line of conversation back.

“No, Cas, listen,” Dean tried again.

“So just by being here with you, I have everything I need, so I don’t want you to feel guilty for not reciprocating my confession. I…”

After letting out a huge sigh of annoyance, Dean cut Castiel off in the only way that he knew would bring the angel back into the here and now. He could tell that Cas was completely thrown off when Dean’s lips met his. He could also tell that the guy was quick on the uptake, because he leaned into the kiss immediately.

Dean had always wondered what it would be like to kiss the angel. He’d never really gotten around to sowing his wild bisexual oats in life, since he was already completely gone on Cas by the time he’d realized they were there in the first place. That made the stubble on Cas’ skin a new experience, one that Dean knew he would never tire of. And when Cas grabbed the back of his head to get them even closer, Dean could only happily comply, the unnecessary parts of his brain already shutting down.

The two bodies moved towards each other as if drawn by a magnet, their limbs tangling together in the most perfect way imaginable. Cas was the first one to push his way into Dean’s mouth, but Dean was the first to start caressing the angel’s back, so there was an unintentional equal division of firsts between the two. Dean moved in further, wanting to be as close to his angel as absolutely possible. The feel of those strong hands digging in under his shirt, hands roughened by battling side by side with Dean for so very long, sent delicious shivers up and down Dean’s spine, the fingers insistent but still light and delicate, as if still not completely convinced that such a thing was allowed.

It only took Dean a nibble or two of Cas’ lower lip to convince those fingers that all was allowed, not just this one minor pleasure. The fingers on the sensitive flesh of his back were halved, only for Dean to feel the missing hand in his hair.

Castiel moaned into the kiss, wanting to feel every little thing that he had thought would never be within his reach. And reach he did, loving the feel of Dean’s hair under his palm, soft where it would’ve looked stiff and unyielding. Then the angel gasped as Dean’s hands somehow managed to slip under his own shirt, which should’ve been buried too far down underneath the layers of his suit coat and trench. He had never had a chance to feel these things before, his brain refusing to remember on its own the traumatic experience that was the only other time he’d been this close to a person, physically. He practically purred when he felt Dean lightly trailing his nails down the sides of his back, a noise he didn’t even know he was capable of until that very moment.

Dean started to slip his hand under Cas’ waistband, loving the way that even something as simple as heavy petting was making the angel squirm so exquisitely in his arms. His hand made it the rest of the way on its journey, and Dean melted as he squeezed Cas’ butt, even though it probably should’ve been the angel melting on that one. Or at least just the angel. Right now, things like logic didn’t matter, only feeling, sensation, millions of nerves being activated in all the right places. As he started to push the white dress shirt out of the way so that he’d have even more access to the heated skin under all those layers, Cas pulled back abruptly, ending the kiss at the same time.

Dean whimpered at the loss of contact. “Cas?” He asked, his voice husky and lips already bruised, still wanting so much more. “What…?”

“It’s Sam,” Castiel said softly, worried how the hunter may react, knowing that his younger brother had just died. “I’m sorry.”

Dean felt all the lust drain out of his body. Sam had died? It was too much, his thoughts automatically going to the worst case scenarios. If Sammy had died on a hunt because he wasn’t there, Dean knew he would never be able to forgive himself.

As if reading Dean’s mind, Castiel added, “Old age, Dean. Sam was well into his eighties, after living a full life.”

“You’re sure?” Dean knew that he could always trust Cas, but this was his baby brother.

Castiel gave him a bitchface in response, one that Sam would’ve been proud of, single raised eyebrow and all.

“Sorry,” Dean quickly replied, hanging his head in shame for a few moments.

“You’ll know where to meet him,” Cas told him, making a move as if to leave.

Dean’s hand shot out and grabbed Cas’ shoulder, gripping it hard. “You’re not going anywhere, Cas. We have a moose to go meet.”

“I just thought,” Cas murmured.

“You’re as much family as him, Cas. I love you, so that means you’re coming with me.” Dean put Baby into gear, knowing exactly where to drive, just as Cas had said. When Dean realized that the angel had been silent for too long, he glanced over.

Castiel was smiling again, so big and bright it was almost blinding, tears definitely forming in his eyes. Dean pulled the car over to the side once again, even though the road was empty except for them. “What?” Dean asked, confused, as he shifted the Impala back into park.

“I love you too, Dean,” Cas said softly, happy tears trailing down his face at full force now.

It took a beat for Dean to understand what his idjit brain hadn’t noticed. He hadn’t told Cas that he loved him, until it had slipped out by accident. It had felt so natural and obvious that he just hadn’t thought about it. He was a total dumbass, but he knew how to make up for it, at least. He turned and put his hands on Cas’ face, holding him as if he were precious, which he was. “I love you, Cas,” he said simply, a few of those happy tears now leaking out of Dean’s eyes as well, they were so contagious. He leaned in for a kiss, a light and sweet little brush of lips, saying everything else that Dean wanted to tell him, everything he had the rest of eternity to say to the angel, over and over in some cases.

Castiel gave Dean his own little brush of a kiss. “I love you, Dean,” he repeated, his eyes glittering in a way Dean never wanted to forget.

They innocently held hands as Dean drove towards the bridge, huddled as close together as they could while still allowing him to drive. As they both stepped out of the car to greet the younger Winchester, who looked exactly as Dean had left him all those years and minutes ago, Sam raised his finger and pointed it accusingly at them both. “I knew it!” he shouted. “I freaking knew it! It took you guys long enough!”

As soon as the meaning of what Sam was saying was clear, Dean blushed enough for three people. “Damn moose,” Dean grumbled, as Sam kept pointing and laughing.

“I think you look cute when you blush,” Castiel whispered back, leaning into Dean comfortably.

“Damn angel,” Dean grumbled in response, earning a light chuckle from said angel. He grabbed Cas’ hand as they walked over to the finally calming down Sam, and they all pulled together for a hug as if it were any old day. As it would always be.

**Author's Note:**

> We can never fix the finale itself, but this should help at least a little bit more for now. Love you guys, and can't wait til my next fic, whenever it is.


End file.
